Review and comparison of 5 massage experiences in Ho Chi Minh

First, I want to thank @Logan and the rest of this community for sharing all your tips and knowledge in an English forum. It has been hugely helpful and a great resource as I planned my trip to Ho Chi Minh.

I recently spent 6 days in Ho Chi Minh, had 5 massage experiences over 4 places. I will do a review and comparison below, over a few posts, as a way of giving back to SMF.

I visited these massage places in Ho Chi Minh:
My visits were spaced out about once a day, to recharge and be consistent on my end. All were 1,000,000 VND massage packages or nearest equivalent.

A little bit about my preferences, so you have some context: I decided to forego hot tocs and blowjob bars and only focused on massages, as I was more keen on the overall massage experiences, particularly GFE (girlfriend experience). Price was not really a limited factor. I like very slim girls and small/medium breasts. I do not speak Vietnamese, but I can speak Chinese on top of English. I was open to full service, but seemed too difficult to setup. I wouldn't have minded going to Little Japan Saigon, but it seems like you pay through the roof.

Some tips to reiterate, as these were previously mentioned and beared out in my experience:
  • Try to go early during a shift, while the girls are fresh. Find out or ask for shift times. For example, Le Han Dai Nam Massage has shifts from 9:00am to 9:00pm and also 9:00pm to 9:00am. For Kim Huy Massage, the popular massage girls start working at 3:00pm. Shifts are usually 12 hours, and tiredness is real.
  • Generally, the prettier and more popular the girl, the lower quality of service. It's hard to nail down the perfect experience. You have to decide what's more important to you.
  • Appointments don't seem to be worth a damn :D so I would not get too upset about it. Things are highly fluid in Vietnam. I generally do walkins.
  • I had mixed experiences with tipping the waiters (usually ~50,000 VND). It's not often mentioned, but I previously understood this is best practice. It's no guarantee you will get the kind of girl you asked for. It seems the trend has been to move towards a fixed price, and this seems less important now.
Stay tuned for more...
Overall Experience Ranking
  1. Zeus Massage, Girl No. 20 - Just superb all around. Hot stone massage, Nuru massage (a real surprise), partial CIM. Put in the effort to give a varied and hot experience.
  2. Phung Thuy Massage, Girl No. 73 - Massage was non-existent, but I had the most incredible GFE experience, despite almost no language communication. Best blowjob skills by a mile with full CIM. She worked really hard. Only pity was her face and body was not my type.
  3. Kim Huy Massage, Girl No. 8 - Friendly and speaks some English (a big plus). Technique wasn't the best, but she made it up with enthusiasm and was wet.
Hottest Massage Girl (bearing in mind my preferences)
  1. Kim Huy Massage, Girl No. 8 - Best figure, especially for guys who like legs.
  2. Le Han Dai Nam Massage, Girl No. 8 - A close second place. Doll-like face, tight body.
  3. Zeus Massage, Girl No. 20 - Very good figure. Only face and complexion lost out to the above.
All 3 girls had great hair. This is almost a given in Vietnam.

Best Skills
  1. Phung Thuy Massage, Girl No. 73 - As mentioned above.
  2. Zeus Massage, Girl No. 20
Kim Huy Massage and Le Han Dai Nam Massage finished me very quick, largely because they were hot and wet.

Language Skills
  1. Zeus Massage, Girl No. 20 - A little bit of English, but quite fluent in Mandarin.
  2. Kim Huy Massage, Girl No. 8 - Slightly better with English than Zeus Massage, Girl No. 20
  3. Le Han Dai Nam Massage, Girl No. 8 - Small amount of English and Mandarin
  1. Zeus Massage, Girl No. 20 - Had Nuru and hot stone massage. Great attention to detail. Pulls out the slippers for you. Will turn off the air conditioner during shower. Playful, smiles, and appeared to enjoy herself from the start, breaks out in tune once in a while. I inquired about CIM, because we could have a conversation in Mandarin, when she started, but she refused. Although at the end, she did a partial CIM. I don't know whether she was surprised or it was intentional, but she never complained or showed any unhappiness. I tipped her extra for delighting the customer.
Not to say it was bad, but the other places offered standard service.

A special mention about Le Han Dai Nam Massage. I was asked to wait 20 minutes when I arrived, due to special request from the girl, but I ended up waiting for about 1 hour before my girl arrived. I was in the waiting room for 45 minutes, and then 15 minutes in the massage room (time in the sauna and the room). I felt forgotten, but Paul tried some service recovery and upgraded me to an extra nice massage room, plus a really hot girl, although it was not the girl I requested. Of my 5 massage experiences, this was the only visit made during peak hours. I made an appointment with Paul to schedule the time and the girl, but I arrived late.

Best Rooms and Facilities (sorry, no photos from me)
  1. Le Han Dai Nam Massage and Zeus Massage
    • Le Han Dai Nam Massage - Due to the above reasons. But I could not see the locker from the sauna/toilet. I brought my valuables to the toilet for security.
    • Zeus Massage - Just as good, but lacking a locker/wardrobe to store your belongings. Special mention for the massage bed with a cut out for the groin area. So clever!
The rooms at Phung Thuy Massage and Kim Huy Massage were not on the same level as the other two places.

General Observations
  • Massage places in District 1 will attempt to give you a real massage before moving on to the happy ending. At peak period, they only want you to finish ASAP. The experience during non-peak hours was much better. The girls were consistently hotter, but you might need to wait.
  • Phung Thuy Massage - What can I say... the rimming is real, and the experience was consistently good. That's why I came twice (get it?). It doesn't feature much in the rankings, but I wouldn't hesitate to go there anytime, due to their consistency - they deliver where it matters most. The best "no brainer" option if you cannot decide where to go.
I originally wanted to make a post for each location, but I think this covered everything I wanted to say.

Suffice to say, Zeus Massage was the closest to perfect. A pity because I went there on my last day in Ho Chi Minh, otherwise I would have certainly returned again.

Feel free to ask any questions that arise.